Sunday, June 3, 2012

Crazyness of a Year

After going through that wonderful weight-loss challenge and staying stable with my weight in the 150's I had a big change.  A change in which was supposed to help my mentality but didnt really help my weight.  I was a lab rat in the sense of trying to find a medication that worked for me and made me somewhat sane.  In that adventure I dealt with a lot of side effects, some noticeable some not so much. 

As you can probably guess one of the side effects were to eat excessively.  I had no control, I was always hungry never getting satisfied.  It almost made me think of that excuse pregnant women give when they eat too much, "Oh I am eating for two I can eat as much as I want." (at least that is the excuse I gave) The only problem was I am not pregnant or ever plan to be.

My mental health was getting better but my physical health was lacking.  I am now close to what I was in weight before I started losing it which is a whopping 174.4.  I know it doesnt seem like much but after working so hard to get those 20+ pounds off it seems huge.  My goal weight is 145 still and I will  achieve it now that I have reached some stability in mental health. (somewhat lol)  There is no excuse. 

I have started the pre-detox in preparation to start the lemon cleanse tomorrow.  Mentally I have disconnected myself from food and feelings.  That sounds bad doesnt it?  So much of eating can be stationed around feelings and the mood you are in hence the term emotional eating.  I am excited to get back to physical well being and feel better about my body again.  To be rejuvenated and refreshed as a whole will be amazing and I am ready to commit.

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